I just found out today that one of my besties from college is pregnant. While the thought of having a big belly, gaining about 50 lbs, and pushing a very large object (er, human, to put it more accurately) out my nether regions sounds quite ridiculous to me, I am surprisingly very excited for her. She’s gonna be the best dang mom, ever. Seriously, she’s so sweet and nurturing, it’s just in her nature. In college she used to take care of us all. I feel like she was just born to be a mom. Whoa. This is completely blowing my mind right now that this is actually happening.
I don’t know how or why, but babies have been so relevant lately…I DON’T LIKE IT! It’s freaking me out!
Not too long ago, I had the oddest dream. Apparently, I was “babysitting” for my friend, Keller (Keller, don’t ask, but you had a baby. If it makes you feel better, it slightly reminded me of a cross between a real baby and a giga pet). Well, I dropped it on his head. It left a decent sized dent. I was really distraught about it, but thankfully, Keller was cool. He wasn’t mad because he said he’s done it a few times this month, himself, having made several hospital trips. But that was all the dream was really about. Oh yea, and we were at Warped Tour. Really? Really. What is wrong with me? Why am I dreaming of babies and why are we dropping them…and even worse, why are we bringing them to Warped Tour??? That just disturbs me.
Ok, then… I just went to my cousin, Tara’s baby shower last week. Normally, I hate baby showers. I swear to Goodness if someone makes me taste baby food and guess which disgusting vegetable or mashed up fruit it is, I’m gonna throw the jars across the room and hope that the caps aren’t on tight. Thank God, my cousin’s shower wasn’t like that at all (I’ve already been to plenty that have). Her’s was actually the nicest one I’ve been to. The cheesiest it got was “Baby Bingo”…and I’m a fan of bingo. The food was great (it was at Carmen Anthony’s Fishhouse in Avon, CT), the weather was beautiful, and seeing my family was awesome (I don’t see them nearly enough)…so I guess, it wasn’t so bad afterall.
But ok, this is where it does get bad. I love this lady tons, but two days ago she shared something I wish I hadn’t come across. See, I’m a huge fan of google reader (ya know?…where people share links to website and blogs about interesting stuff they come across on the web)…well, this lady shared a lovely birthing story. Don’t ask why, but I read it. Oh God, why did I read it? There was, also, a video attached. Yes, that’s right, a video of the birth…a water birth. I swear, I didn’t want to watch it. Seriously, I really didn’t want to, but it was like a trainwreck. I couldn’t help it. For some reason, I pushed play, and trust me, it was a mistake…a big one. Without exaggeration, this has completely put my thoughts of ever having children in question. Call me immature, but I think that’s exactly what I am…immature…meaning NOT READY, not for a LONG time.
The other day I was home lying in my bed, and my puppy came up and snuggled next to me. At this time, I really thought I didn’t need children at all. Give me my puppy and I think I’d be completely content. No whining, no spit-ups, no teenage angst, no paying 18 years of savings for college…just a toy, a leash, and some yummy little snacks. Sounds perfect to me.
Geez, I must really be getting old if all this is worrying me right now. Babies, be gone, now, please!
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